under the radar

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Posts by under the radar

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  211

  Where are you from?

  by BeautifulMind in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i know we are all anonymous for our own personal reasons, so i understand if you would rather not say.

  but if you don't mind sharing that would be cool.

  i currently live in georgia, usa.

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  under the radar

  Born and raised in GA USA. Lived in TN over 30 years. Living in NH for the last 10 years, the happiest of my life.
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  8

  Personal experience rant

  by Crazyguy in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  so i was reading over new member hollywood 20s experience and thinking of using it when i'm going to talk with my son that their trying to get baptized.

  so that with all the other things through my mind i decided to say some things to him about what's going on with my daughter.

  so this is what happening with her.

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  under the radar

  I sure hope your daughter gets the treatment she needs and recovers quickly. I can't imagine the stress you and your whole family must be under. Hang in there.
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  31

  Hello everyone! I am new here and want to tell you about myself - my bio

  by Hollywood20 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  grew up in east la in a bad neighborhood to a black mother and white father.

  i never knew my father because he died in a car accident when i was a few weeks old.

  my mother converted as a jw soon after when two sisters came to her door and offered her comfort, which was something she needed.

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  under the radar

  I completely agree with WingCommander. You may have to grovel a bit. Do it!

  I was pressured from every side to give up my dreams and not pursue a career in aviation. I was older than you and more established, and maybe that made me more able to withstand the pressure and basically tell them to pound sand. But I am SO glad I did. You can, too.

  PLEASE follow WingCommander's advice and give it another shot. If you don't, you'll never know what might have happened.
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  21

  Update on Australian Royal Commission - Proposed Redress

  by Pants of Righteousness in

  1. watchtower
  2. child-abuse

  apologies if this has been posted previously, but this news item has appeared today regarding the proposed redress for abuse victims following the australian royal commission:.

  http://www.abc.net.au/news/2015-10-27/labor-pledges-payments-for-sex-abuse-survivors/6886864.

  what's interesting is that in january it was proposed that the federal government contribute almost half of an estimated $4.3 billion redress scheme.

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  under the radar

  No government (read "taxpayers") should pay any part of any redress scheme. The guilty parties and the organizations that covered up for them should be the ones paying.

  I think religions should be taxed the same as any other "business." Only actual charitable activities like providing meals and housing for the destitute or victims of disaster should be exempted. No "teaching English" or "providing cultural education" bull-crap as a ruse for proselytizing. No shuffling money around from "charity" to "charity" to hide their wealth. No special treatment or protections not available to any other business.

  More important, religion should no longer be something one can hide behind and expect exemptions from the laws that everyone else must obey. "Believe what you want, but you may not impose those beliefs on anyone else nor demand that they comply with those beliefs outside your own home." Freedom to believe is near absolute. Freedom to act on those beliefs is not.

  To me, the "Establishment Clause" of the US Constitution means that the government may not endorse or support or give any special consideration to any religion or belief system. Would that that were so...
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  63

  Just found out their about to baptise my 14 year old boy.

  by Crazyguy in

  1. watchtower
  2. child-abuse

  there doing this right under my nose but i just found out.

  not sure what to do but would like your help on getting me wt information on my headship role and how they shouldn't be doing this with out my permission.

  also would like some help on showing my son the ramifications on what happens to someone when they get baptized and how they'll expect him to treat me.

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  under the radar

  Hi Crazyguy. I can sympathize with your predicament. This is a dangerous situation, and I hope you can "nip it in the bud."

  I am certainly not holding myself out as any sort of example, but this is what worked for me:

  (Bear in mind, I was "in" at the time and usually attended meetings when I was in town, but was mostly going through the motions and almost never went in "service." I couldn't force myself to try to teach others something I didn't truly believe myself. I was also open and occasionally vocal about things about the organization that bothered me. That included some outright skepticism about certain of the more "iffy" doctrines, interpretations, and policies.)

  When my son was around 12 or 13, I was working away from home about every other week or so. My wife and a "brother" from the congregation (who considered himself my best friend) took it upon themselves to indoctrinate him into getting baptized. They "studied" with him behind my back and would tell him I wasn't doing right and he had to help me so I wouldn't be destroyed at Armageddon. One night he came to me in tears, asking why I wasn't serving "the big J" and saying he didn't want me to be destroyed. It broke my heart, just as his little heart was breaking.
  

  We had a long talk about things and I tried to comfort him that I wasn't doing anything bad and I just had some problems with the organization (not "J-dog" himself) and that I didn't feel right putting on a show just because of what others might think. He calmed down and became his normal happy and loving self again. The crisis was averted, but I knew I had to take action.

  I immediately put my foot down, and hard! Under no circumstances was anyone other than his mother to "study" with him. When I was away, he was to obey his mother and go to the meetings with her, out of respect for her feelings as his mother, until he was 18. But he could not be compelled to go in "service." And under no circumstances whatsoever could he be baptized before he was 18. I absolutely forbade it, under threat of immediate divorce and full court press to get 100% custody. And I could have done it, too. There are circumstances not discussed here that would have practically guaranteed it. Most importantly, his mother knew I meant business, so she backed off.

  He dutifully went with her to the meetings until his 18th birthday. That was his last meeting, and mine as well. That was 15 years ago, and he is now a happy and successful adult. He loves his mom and sees her often (she and I have lived apart for the last 10 years), but she has learned the quickest way to put him off is to try to push more religious nonsense down his throat. He has had more than enough.

  Crazyguy, PLEASE play the "headship card," or whatever else will work, and make sure no outsider "studies" with your son behind your back. And forbid him to get baptized until he is at least 18 and knows what he's doing. I can almost guarantee he'll love you for it in the end. He'll know you stood up for him and kept him from making a terrible mistake when he didn't have all the facts and was too young to understand the lifelong ramifications.

  Good luck...
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  22

  Online Watchtower publications archives?

  by slimboyfat in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  years ago i remember there being a number of sites with pretty extensive archives of watchtower publications online.

  can anyone direct me to the best current site for this material?

  in particular i am looking for a booklet from 1898 called "the bible vs. the theory of evolution".

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  under the radar

  Welcome back, slimboyfat!

  I am looking for a particular item that may be on pages 4-9 or 13-14 of that Oct 22, 1988 Awake. It acknowledges that a non-custodial divorced JW parent may be prohibited by Court Order from discussing his religion with his child, but then suggests ways he could spur an interest in "spiritual" things indirectly.

  I appreciate any help you can give me in checking this material.
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  35

  Jehovah's Witness grandparents ordered to keep faith to themselves

  by OrphanCrow in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  british columbia, canada.

  jehovah's witness grandparents ordered to keep faith to themselves.

  a pair of devout jehovah's witnesses have been ordered by a b.c.

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  under the radar

  Why is the biological father of this child not being held responsible to support her? The mother, and good on her, is back to working so presumably is not on the public dole. But what about other expenses like medical care? Why should the public support this child when the father should be doing so? Apparently, he has acknowledged paternity and still sees the child from time to time.

  I obviously don't know about the circumstances of the mother's other child, but one would hope that father is paying child support. People should not be allowed to get away with fathering or having children they cannot support.
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  22

  Online Watchtower publications archives?

  by slimboyfat in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  years ago i remember there being a number of sites with pretty extensive archives of watchtower publications online.

  can anyone direct me to the best current site for this material?

  in particular i am looking for a booklet from 1898 called "the bible vs. the theory of evolution".

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  under the radar

  If anyone can post a copy or a link to the October 22, 1988 Awake! I'd sure appreciate it.
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  61

  Stranger in my own house, Since my wife and i don't talk much anymore nor sleep in the same bed. i feel like a stranger.

  by goingthruthemotions in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  my wife is shunning me.

  she is always in cult mode, we don't talk anymore, we don't sleep in the same bed.

  i have been sleeping on the couch.

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  under the radar

  I agree with everyone else who said to play the headship card.

  YOU take the bedroom and tell her to sleep on the couch herself until she is ready to obey the scripture that forbids withholding the "marital due." This specifically applies to even an "unbelieving" mate.

  SHE is acting unscripturally on at least two counts: not respecting your headship by "forcing" you from your rightful bedroom, and by unjustifiably withholding the "marital due."
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  5

  B.C. provincial court-Jehovah's Witness grandparents ordered to keep faith to themselves

  by mzmmom3 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i re joined just to post this.

  great feeling of validation, as this is why my entire family disowned me.. http://www.cbc.ca/m/news/canada/british-columbia/jehovah-s-witness-grandparents-ordered-to-keep-faith-to-themselves-1.3282193.

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  under the radar

  Sorry about the double post. I went back to make some corrections and add more information, but my editing window apparently closed while I was doing so.

  There was an Awake! article several years back that discussed this very thing. It gave the example of how a non-custodial father who was prohibited by the Court from discussing religion with his child could comply with that restriction and still get the child thinking about spiritual things indirectly.

  I couldn't find this specific article in the Society's online library, but under "Child Custody" in the index it refers to a couple of places (pages 4-9 and 13-14) in the October 22, 1988 Awake! that dealt extensively with divorce and this issue specifically. I'm not sure this is the exact article I am thinking of and I can't check it because the online library doesn't contain much material earlier than 2000. The index shows the reference, but it's grayed out and there is no link. Hopefully, someone here has a hard copy of that issue and will post a copy or a link to it. I'd appreciate it. You're welcome to PM me if you'd rather not post the whole article publicly.
  

  The index had another reference that may be what I'm looking for. It was the December 8, 1997 Awake!, pages 5-7. It's not available online either.